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1
General / List of WOMEN LAWS as women see them
« on: February 02, 2007, 10:59:53 PM »
Well guys, after putting a few Man Laws together, I've decided to put some thought into 'what rules women live by'... I am sure lots of you came across women who will fit into this pattern by the way they treat us 
...
Roshan probably won't be able to relate to all this, as most likely he doesn't know what a woman is. Yet.
So here goes:
1. The female always makes the rules.
2. The rules are subject to change at any time without prior notification.
3. No male can possibly know all the rules.
4. If the female suspects the male knows all the rules, she must immediately change some or all of the rules.
5. The female is never wrong.
6. If the female is wrong, it is because of a flagrant misunderstandi ng which was a direct result of something the male did or said wrong.
7. If Rule 6 applies, the male must apologize immediately for causing the misunderstandi ng.
8. The female can change her mind at any given point in time.
9. The male must never change his mind without express written consent from the female.
10. The female has every right to be angry or upset at any time.
11. The male must remain calm at all times, unless the female wants him to be angry or upset.
12. The female must under no circumstances let the male know whether or not she wants him to be angry or upset.
Feel free to contribute
Roshan - feel free to be excluded haha!
... Roshan probably won't be able to relate to all this, as most likely he doesn't know what a woman is. Yet.
So here goes:
1. The female always makes the rules.
2. The rules are subject to change at any time without prior notification.
3. No male can possibly know all the rules.
4. If the female suspects the male knows all the rules, she must immediately change some or all of the rules.
5. The female is never wrong.
6. If the female is wrong, it is because of a flagrant misunderstandi ng which was a direct result of something the male did or said wrong.
7. If Rule 6 applies, the male must apologize immediately for causing the misunderstandi ng.
8. The female can change her mind at any given point in time.
9. The male must never change his mind without express written consent from the female.
10. The female has every right to be angry or upset at any time.
11. The male must remain calm at all times, unless the female wants him to be angry or upset.
12. The female must under no circumstances let the male know whether or not she wants him to be angry or upset.
Feel free to contribute
Roshan - feel free to be excluded haha!
2
General / List of Man Laws - Feel free to contribute :)
« on: January 31, 2007, 08:15:35 PM »
Man Laws suggestions:
- Never use chapstick in front of any other living thing.
- Physically abuse your wife with calm, collected rage rather than violent, impetuous rage.
- Never provide any useful information when questioned by your friends significant other.
- Never have a conversation with a woman longer than you can have sex with her. (Unless said conversation is leading to sex.)
- The only permissible birthday presents for a male friend is alcohol, strippers and a round of bowling.
- -It is never cool to dance at a bar/club unless the goal is pick up/retain women. Any other reason is gay.
- -Scented candles are only appropriate in a man's bathroom or in his bedroom. They may only be lit upon a coitus candidate's emminant entrance into the house or other sex related times.
- The only time you and a strap on are allowed in the same room is when your crackin' it over your girl's skull. ( Or when you and your girl are DPing her NFL cheerleader roommate.)
- It's 'Football Sunday, not 'Let Me Help You Grade Papers' Sunday, so shut your mouth or I'll get the strap on.
- You may shave above the neckline only!
- Your dog must weigh at least 1/3rd of your body weight and cannot be a pug, toy poodle, or a chiuhaha.
- Real men do not recognize eggshell, aquamarine, teal, or any bullshit like that as colors. With the exception of orange, names of fruit are not colors. Flavors (vanilla, chocolate) don't count as colors either.
- Any man who brings a camera to a bachelor party may be legally killed and eaten by his fellow partygoers.
- The morning after you and a babe who was formerly “just a friend” have carnal, drunken monkey sex, the fact that you’re feeling weird and guilty is no reason not to nail her again before the discussion about what a big mistake it was.
- If it takes longer than about 15 minutes to shower, shit, shave and be dressed and out the door, there is something wrong.
- You understand that there is no problem that cannot be resolved by the application of sufficient brute force and ignorance.
- If it doesn't work with force - apply more force.
- At the gym, a man must not engage in any physical activity involving
any organized class that dosen't involve beating the shit out of someone.
- No bath! Take a shower. Laying down in a vulnerable state soaking in your own dirt is gay.
- When someone asks you if you are OK, you will answer in the affirmative. If you can understand the question you are OK.
- No man may ever ask another man what he is "thinking", unless both are in a situation involving fixing machinery, picking up women, or war.
- To admit you're wrong is the exact same thing as whipping it out and cutting it off with a rusty tire iron.
- Unless you're an on-fire homo, you will not drive the new VW Beetle.
- Know how to drive a fuckin stick!
O=={;;;EDGE;;;>
- Never use chapstick in front of any other living thing.
- Physically abuse your wife with calm, collected rage rather than violent, impetuous rage.
- Never provide any useful information when questioned by your friends significant other.
- Never have a conversation with a woman longer than you can have sex with her. (Unless said conversation is leading to sex.)
- The only permissible birthday presents for a male friend is alcohol, strippers and a round of bowling.
- -It is never cool to dance at a bar/club unless the goal is pick up/retain women. Any other reason is gay.
- -Scented candles are only appropriate in a man's bathroom or in his bedroom. They may only be lit upon a coitus candidate's emminant entrance into the house or other sex related times.
- The only time you and a strap on are allowed in the same room is when your crackin' it over your girl's skull. ( Or when you and your girl are DPing her NFL cheerleader roommate.)
- It's 'Football Sunday, not 'Let Me Help You Grade Papers' Sunday, so shut your mouth or I'll get the strap on.
- You may shave above the neckline only!
- Your dog must weigh at least 1/3rd of your body weight and cannot be a pug, toy poodle, or a chiuhaha.
- Real men do not recognize eggshell, aquamarine, teal, or any bullshit like that as colors. With the exception of orange, names of fruit are not colors. Flavors (vanilla, chocolate) don't count as colors either.
- Any man who brings a camera to a bachelor party may be legally killed and eaten by his fellow partygoers.
- The morning after you and a babe who was formerly “just a friend” have carnal, drunken monkey sex, the fact that you’re feeling weird and guilty is no reason not to nail her again before the discussion about what a big mistake it was.
- If it takes longer than about 15 minutes to shower, shit, shave and be dressed and out the door, there is something wrong.
- You understand that there is no problem that cannot be resolved by the application of sufficient brute force and ignorance.
- If it doesn't work with force - apply more force.
- At the gym, a man must not engage in any physical activity involving
any organized class that dosen't involve beating the shit out of someone.
- No bath! Take a shower. Laying down in a vulnerable state soaking in your own dirt is gay.
- When someone asks you if you are OK, you will answer in the affirmative. If you can understand the question you are OK.
- No man may ever ask another man what he is "thinking", unless both are in a situation involving fixing machinery, picking up women, or war.
- To admit you're wrong is the exact same thing as whipping it out and cutting it off with a rusty tire iron.
- Unless you're an on-fire homo, you will not drive the new VW Beetle.
- Know how to drive a fuckin stick!
O=={;;;EDGE;;;>
3
BF 1942 / M@f|A 1.61 $eRVEr
« on: January 28, 2007, 12:04:42 PM »
Hey guys - I used to play on the old 1.61 server, before it went down long time ago.. The new one is alway empty... What is up with that? Just curious - Why do you prefer the 1.60 version?
4
Flame / Mafia disappointment!
« on: January 28, 2007, 11:19:45 AM »
Well guys... I've been playing on Mafia servers for a long time, on and off, and used to love them! Enjoyed seeing Misfit, Beetlejuice, Krautkiller, and many others kick ass... But I've rarely seen a Mafia member taking a 'Looser Attitude' and kicking someone for killing him fair and square. So PRO HELI, I know, I know - But kicking me for killing you in Coral Sea??? An attitude I would expect from my 6 y/o son, not a Mafia member.
The game is full of lame ass idiots, plane campers, arti douche bags and other buttholes - And that is why I always enjoyed Mafia servers - I knew that it is the right place for just plain butt kicking fun.
Please guys, please PRO HELI AND OTHERS - Don't fall into the 'Lamers' slot! Cheat, hack, kill, and burn - but always be real MEN...
The Edge, aka O=={;;;EDGE;;;>
The game is full of lame ass idiots, plane campers, arti douche bags and other buttholes - And that is why I always enjoyed Mafia servers - I knew that it is the right place for just plain butt kicking fun.
Please guys, please PRO HELI AND OTHERS - Don't fall into the 'Lamers' slot! Cheat, hack, kill, and burn - but always be real MEN...
The Edge, aka O=={;;;EDGE;;;>
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