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Author Topic: How unlucky  (Read 2056 times)

Gear

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How unlucky
« on: February 09, 2006, 09:17:08 PM »

Subject:  I hate my job
 
The next time you have a bad day at work ... think of this guy.
 
Rob is a commercial saturation diver for Global Divers in Louisiana. He
performs underwater repairs on offshore drilling rigs. Below is an E-mail  he sent to his sister. She then sent it to radio station 103.2 on FM dia
in Ft. Wayne, Indiana, who was sponsoring a worst job experience contest.
 
Needless to say, she won!
 
Hi Sue:
 
Just another note from your bottom-dwelling brother.  Last week I had a bad  day at the office. I know you've been feeling down lately at work, so I thought I would
share my dilemma with you to make you realize it's not so bad after all.
Before I can tell you what happened to me, I first must bore you with a few  technicalities
of my job.
 
As you know, my office lies at the bottom of the sea.  I wear a suit to the
office. It's a wet suit. This time of year the water is quite cool. So what   we do to keep warm is this: We have a diesel powered industrial
water heater. This $20,000 piece of equipment sucks the water out of the sea. It heats it to a delightful temperature.
 
It then pumps it down to the diver through a garden hose, which is taped to
the air hose. Now this sounds like a darn good plan, and I've used it several times with no complaints. What I do, when I get to the bottom and start working, is take the hose and stuff it down the back of my wet suit.
 
This floods my whole suit with warm water. It's like working in a Jacuzzi.
Everything was going well until all of a sudden, my butt started to itch.
So, of course, I scratched it. This only made things worse.
 
Within a few seconds my butt started to burn. I pulled the hose out from my
back, but the damage was done. In agony I realized what had happened. The
hot water machine had sucked up a jellyfish and pumped it into my suit.
 
Now, since I don't have any hair on my back, the jellyfish couldn't stick
to it. However, the crack of my butt was not as fortunate.
 
When I scratched what I thought was an itch, I was actually grinding the
jellyfish into the crack of my butt. I informed the dive supervisor of my
dilemma over the communicator. His instructions were unclear due to the fact that he, along with five other divers, were all laughing hysterically.
 
Needless to say I aborted the dive. I was instructed to make three
agonizing in-water decompression stops totaling thirty-five minutes before
I could reach the surface to begin my chamber dry decompression. When I arrived at the surface, I was wearing nothing but my brass helmet.
 
As I climbed out of  the water, the medic, with tears of laughter running
down his face, handed me a tube of cream and told me to rub it on my butt
as soon as I got in the chamber. The cream put the fire out, but I couldn't poop for two days because my butt was swollen shut.
 
So, next time you're having a bad day at work, think about how much worse
it would be if you had a jellyfish shoved up your butt.
 
Now repeat to yourself, "I love my job, I love my job, I love my job"
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*MAFIA* Milky Way

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How unlucky
« Reply #1 on: February 09, 2006, 09:22:52 PM »

ehhh i wouldent say that its his own fault for doing it rofl
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Brian

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How unlucky
« Reply #2 on: February 09, 2006, 09:29:16 PM »

Damn that sucks balls. But that is pretty hilarious.
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Gear

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How unlucky
« Reply #3 on: February 10, 2006, 03:57:43 PM »

Lol, im glad im not that guy.
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*MAFIA* Bonehead

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How unlucky
« Reply #4 on: February 10, 2006, 04:14:05 PM »

Oh man that poor dude.
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*MAFIA* KrautKiller

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How unlucky
« Reply #5 on: February 10, 2006, 05:22:47 PM »

Well, It sounds like a pretty simple job.  I bet it pays good
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socrry

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How unlucky
« Reply #6 on: February 11, 2006, 05:51:08 AM »

that sucks for him good thing i don't have that job
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*MAFIA* ßlåkjáx

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How unlucky
« Reply #7 on: February 11, 2006, 08:48:51 PM »

wow, summary plz
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Brian

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How unlucky
« Reply #8 on: February 11, 2006, 08:52:37 PM »

Guy dives and a jellyfish stings him in his crack.
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ThaSnyper

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How unlucky
« Reply #9 on: February 11, 2006, 08:52:44 PM »

Yeah it was too long to read...Fthat
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