Listen her niggers im gonna try my hand at film reviewing, just call me the straight ebert.
this prolly has spoilers so if you haven't seen this movie you can leave, also, i have been up for damn near 24 hours, i dont know what the fuck i am talking about most of the time so bear with me. Also, if you are wondering why it is set up funny, i typed it out as i watched it in notepad then copied it here making it wierd.
First movie imma be shooting the shit to you faggots on is this movie called "inglorious basterds"
which is supposed to be starring brad pitt but is mainly about some german piece of shit that is no
where near as sexy and whom im assuming has bad breath.We will call him motormouth.
The film starts with motormouth fuckbag pulling up to some french dudes house who is a pussy....so we will call him
D-bag, well anyway dbag goes on about why milk is amazing, giving motormouth some of his milk. Motormouth means
business though, anyway dbag is hiding jews, motormouth knows it, well dbag eventually gives up the jews in his house.
motormouth orders krautfags to kill jewbags but lets little girl-jew run away...
Confusing enough right?
well anyway it then shows brad pitt getting jew peeps to scalp nazi's (or some nonsense) then the next scene shows them scalping nazis
then there is about 30+ minutes of some blabbering, after that some german war hero meets "older-jew-fag-girl" who now owns a movie theater.
Any way German hero man wants older-jew-fag-girl to lick his cock so he stalks her. Later telling her that he has a movie made about him and wants it
in her movie place. Skip ahead about 30 minutes and a random german fucking a random french chick later then they are gonna air said movie in old-jew-girls
place. Anyway another 30 minutes and a bunch of nigger talk later, jew girl plots to burn down the movie theater with high ranking nazis in it watching the movie.
Brad pitts plan is similar. Skip ahead another 30 and a bunch of talking that has no bearing in said movie and brad pitt is captured and motormouth is now working with
them or some shit. movie place burns, and everyone dies....the end. (not really)
I neglected to mention this movie is more about the story than mindless violence which is what i had originally thought it would be. Although when i first started watching
i thought Brad Pitt was the main character i was wrong, he will be there for about 3 minutes then gone for an hour and a half. I neglected to mention that the fighting scenes
were badass, like scalping, beating a dude to death with a baseball bat, and carving swastikas into nazis foreheads. There is also some really badass music in it.
If you haven't seen it, go fucking see it, when you can, whores.
