Roommates want to grow pot and refuse to stop when I asked them to. We all have our names on the lease agreement for the apartment, so I am just as liable when one of their big mouths fucks up their plan and get caught. They refuse to stop building their ridiculous grow-room setup, so I am left with trying to kill their plants.
Suggestions on how to kill the plants? Salt in the water, over-fertilize, and pests are all I can think of.
Alright, Listen up son!
Here's what you gotta do....
Number One, Uno, the fucking FIRST thing you got's-ta-duuuuuuuuu....
Get these fuckers high one night. I'm talking SUPER fucked up! We are talking beyond all levels of reasoning how a person could still be a functioning organism that it has ingested so much fucking herb.
After they are good and toasted (step deuce is going to take some prep work)....
RUN INTO THE ROOM BLARING THE MOST DISTURBING MUSIC YOU CAN GET YOUR HANDS ON WEARING THIS!

As far as music goes, I recommend either middle-eastern nu-age pop or some form of black metal. Make sure it's at least 190db.
Attach a GIANT Papier-mâché dick to the costume. Note, this dildo will be filled with fake (or real if you're nasty Ms. Jackson) blood.
Whilst standing in front of the blown-out wonder twins, take a machete and cut the dick off the costume and scream the following statement, "IT WAS THE JEWWWWWWWSSSSS
SS!"
Immediately run off into the night until the following morning.
Pro-Tip: Steal their cell-phones before all this transpires so as to provide an extra level of panic.
Or you know...
Murder.